So i have decided to start a blog spot for myself. I have tons of things going on in my brain. Whether it be questions, answers, or just needing and wanting to vent. So lets get started!
Today was an O.K. day. My children woke me up about 8:00am as usual! Which i absolutely HATE! I mean lets keep it real I did not plan on having any of my children. I have two by the way. My first when i was 18 and my second at 20! What the Heck was i thinking?! Now that i'm older i see what i should've and would've done differently. Not saying that i don't love my children unconditionally because i do! Very Much! It is just i wish i could've provided a better life for them. We life nicely now but i am currently in school trying to get my nursing degree which i have been doing now for the past 5yrs!!!! Off and on! Now you tell me what i'm thinking! Never really got a chance to have a "young life". At times i find myself going out and i feel quilty because i'm not home with my babies. They have become my whole entire life and i don't feel like that is healthy. I know we are to love our children, and provide, nuture, etc. But is it wrong to have a life outside of them? Is it wrong to want to get away for awhile sometimes. How does the whole relationship thing work? I'm not married, and my childrens father i DO NOT want to be with. I feel sorta trapped at times because i know that everything that i do will effect my children at one point or another. How am i supposed to decifier what is healthy or not, when me myself am young and i know i am in a mistake making stage. Really don't know whether i'm going or coming right now. It's VERY stressful, scary, and all that other mess. I named my blog Such A Lady because that is my goal to be a Lady. A Women Of Virtue as its described in the Bible. I'm trying my hardest but sometimes it doesn't seem like its good enough.
